Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
A+ Viking dick
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
