I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
