My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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