At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
My vagina is very pro this idea
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
