adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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