She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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