I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
