I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
