i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
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