return my video game
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
