I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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