too bad you live with your parents still
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
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