He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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