I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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