I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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