at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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