Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind

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(302): View more from Delaware

and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...

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(503): View more from Oregon

You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??

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(916): View more from California

Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.

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(530): View more from California

Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'

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(512): View more from Texas

Whats your number? 5 or more?

(973): View more from New Jersey

Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

That was super inconsiderate of me

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