Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
