I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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