i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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