ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
