At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize