she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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