We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
