the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
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