3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
