he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
