We're facebook friends in real life
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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