I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize