I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
