I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
