It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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