HIV tests are more positive than that guy
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
