dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
