I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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