you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
