So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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