I need help removing her.
I just pynch a tree in the face
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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