i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
vagina is talking i cant
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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