Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
