anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
