omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
We need a shit load of segways right now
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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