If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
vagina is talking i cant
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I will pee on everything he values.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
There are leaves in my underwear?
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