its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Randomize