He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
This is the high leading the old right now
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
