Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I wish i was in the wii world.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
