if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
