Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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