Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
