omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
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